Connecticut Breast Cancer Coalition/Foundation

Connecticut Breast Cancer Coalition - Working For A Cure

Connecticut Breast Cancer Coalition/Foundation

First Place - Essay #22
How Breast Cancer Has Impacted My Life
By Anthony Lombardi
Shelton High School

            The lights shine in my eyes as my father enters the room to wake up my brother and me. I look at the clock to read 4:52 a.m. and walk down the stairs to find all my relatives surrounding my mother, who has an oxygen mask over her face. My mother is dying, and it is a matter of minutes. I feel numb, not crying, just hugging her and saying, “It’s okay, Mom. You won’t hurt anymore.” At 4:59 a.m. my aunt says it is over; my mother has stopped breathing. The loss of my mother to breast cancer has had the most profound effect in my life.
            Dealing with the everyday changes in my life was the easy part; the hard part was accepting the fact that she died. Coping with my anger as a result of her death was my biggest challenge, but dealing with that anger has made me into the person that I am today. It took an English assignment during my sophomore year to fully accept the anger associated with the loss of my mother and to allow myself to feel the pain rather than ignore it.
            The novel The Secret Life of Bees aided me in coping with the loss of my mother on many levels. I could easily relate to the anger that the main character Lily felt due to the absence of a mother in her life. For the first time I began to allow people to reach out to me in ways that I had been guarded about. I began to express and openly talk about my mother’s death and tell my story and what I had experienced. This greatly opened me up and I learned that you do not always need to be strong; genuine emotion is not something that should be hidden. Everyone is vulnerable about something; allowing others to see that vulnerability helps you create bonds with people and takes friendship to a whole new level.
            My high school years have been vastly affected by the loss of my mother, but I feel that I have overcome the loss. I am more confident and more mature as a result learned to accept and cope with the tragedy that had occurred in my life. I can confidently walk into school and get my academics done to the best of my ability. Most importantly, I am happy, and to me, that is the greatest satisfaction that anyone can have. Life is the most beautiful thing in the world, and I know that my mother would be proud of me and support any decisions that I have made and that I will continue to make throughout my life.

Essay #76
Bring it on
By Catherine Cuteri
Joel Barlow High School

           I’ve always hated roller-coasters. The nail-biting anticipation that ties your gut into knows. The musty smell of a hot summer day and regurgitated fried dough. The flocks of thrill-seekers surrounding you, seemingly excited to seek their demise. I, on the other hand, can’t find the least bit of excitement in voluntarily strapping myself into a putrid plastic seat headed for nausea and doom. But maybe this is because I’m constantly held hostage to a different type of roller coaster everyday.
            Cancer. Six letters, two syllables, and the ability to infect millions of innocent lives daily. I entered kindergarten with words like chemotherapy and white blood cell count already part of my limited vocabulary. As my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, I became a blind-folded passenger on my very own roller coaster of hell.
            During my freshman year of high school, I found out my mom’s breast cancer had spread to her brain. Finally mature enough to no longer be spared of any of the gruesome details, the reality of my mom’s fight hit me hard. I went to the hospital with my sister to find the woman I took for granted merely hours earlier, transformed. She was speechless, her body only expressed through beeping machines and wavering graphs. Tubes flowed in and out, as she drowned deeper and deeper into a powder-blue hospital gown. My problems were nothing compared to the scan of my mother’s brain flashing before my eyes. I was changed.
            Six months later, my mom was in the audience of my dance recital, cheering me on and looking even more beautiful than she had before. She was back to her old self, but I was not. I was stronger, I was kinder, and my skin began to grow thick, nearly bullet-proof.
            My mom, determined to not let anything get her down permeated my work ethic at school and dance. I won’t give up; I work harder. I take challenges and bite through them piece by piece. Granted, math homework and pirouettes don’t take the toll of radiation and Gamma Knife, but the tactics to overcome them are very much the same. I don’t cry at the heart-wrenching ending of “Marley and Me” or ball my eyes out when I’m asked last to Prom. I know better. I stand through and fight each battle, small or large, with the tactics my mother inspired in me.
            Although I’ve yet to step foot on a real-life roller-coaster, I consider myself pretty brave. I know a loop is right around the corner, I know a straight-away is never really all that straight, and I know the ride is just beginning. This time the fearful little girl is nowhere to be found. I’m no longer clutching to the bar, head ducked beneath a trembling arm. Instead, I raise my arms, focus ahead, and smile, screaming into the face of terror, “Bring it on.”

Addendum:
My mother passed away November 14th 2009, just in time for us to share a last joy of finding out I was accepted to Boston College, a school she and I had dreamed of me attending for years. Although my mom won’t be here for the rest of my life’s journey, her presence will linger in my life forever. I will never forget her strength or her beauty, her joy or her grace, and I’m assured the mark she made on this world will never be erased. Yes, cancer has taken a lot from me over the years. But cancer will never touch the lessons she instilled in me or the love I still feel from her in my soul. I will forever be strengthened by the twelve-year-long battle my mom fought and the invincible perseverance she carried with her till the end; that, cancer can never take from me.

Essay #16
Strength
By Julianne Balzo
Wethersfield High School

           Confusion, panic, and shock raced through my mind; my mom had been diagnosed with breast cancer. Never did I think my mom would be affected by cancer. In my immature mind, she was immune to anything that would harm her or affect our family. Reality set in when she started her treatments. She hardly missed a beat, attending my cheerleading games and swim meets, working every day even after chemo and radiation treatments, keeping up with the house, walking three miles every day with our dog, and always being there for my brother and me just like always. Her strength has inspired me to change some of the ways I handle things in my life.
            In the beginning, I was so scared and confused, that I faced this hardship in the wrong way. All I wished was for this to all go away and for my mom to be healthy and back to her old self. When she started losing her hair, I really started to panic and did not know how to cope with this change. My grades started to slip when weekends with my friends became my priority, and cheerleading became a distracting obsession. It took me a couple of months to process the way I was acting. My behavior was only creating more stress for my mom, when all she needed then was love and support. I knew I had to grow up and accept this, so I did.
            I jumped at any opportunity to help her or make her day a little easier. My views and priorities changed for the better. I realized all the respect I have for my mom and everything else she does and has given me. My appreciation for my family and my friends has grown. It is so amazing to see how much support you receive from people when you are handling a stressful situation. It was hard hiding my worry from my mom, but I realized how happy she got when she saw me happy. You never know what people are going through in their private lives and a smile can really make someone’s day. Seeing my mom fight through this sickness and seeing her succeed with her normal daily activities showed me that anything is possible.
            I put more effort into my school work; why hold anything back when you can put 100% and live up to your fullest potential? My grades shot back up to A’s and B’s. After realizing how important education is, I have been hard working and focused in order to keep my grades up, just like my mom focused on fighting through cancer. My mom’s strength reflected in my sports as well. Sports have always been a major priority for me and I realize how I have benefited from them. I have embraced cheerleading and
swimming because they have made me determined, outgoing, disciplined and a stronger person, both physically and emotionally.
            My mentality is to never give up and my potential is limitless. This experience has also opened my eyes as to how precious life is, which has turned me into a more spontaneous person. I jump at new opportunities to grow as a person and learn something new, because I’ve seen how things can change and affect your life. Life is a gift. You should be thankful for everything you have and all the people who contribute to your life. It often takes a loss or a struggle to appreciate the wonderful things we take for granted every day. I’m so thankful my mom survived; she is healthy and happy. My mom’s experience has turned me into a better person who is now more focused, determined and appreciative of the little things in life.

Essay #19
Determination Will Last a Lifetime, and so Will She
By Sara Jacobowitz
North Haven High School

           My mother does not realize the impact she had on my life. She made me realize that life is not always perfect, but anyone has the ability to improve it. She taught me that anything is possible. It is because of her that I strive to be the best version of myself and I have the strength to handle any situation that comes my way. My mother may not be aware of it, but she passed her strength onto me and it is because of this that I would like to help people the way she has helped me.
            On May 30th 2008 my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. I will never forget this date, as it has come a part of me. The news came to me through a text message, and I didn’t believe it at first. I could not understand how something like that could happen to my mother. When it finally hit me, my body felt like it had been ripped apart. Early on I knew I had to be strong for her. She needed me like I had needed her so many times before. She was a struggling single mother who had to raise her two children, run her business, and now deal with her cancer. It was her determination that got her through it. She was determined to keep me and my brother in the house we had grown up in even though we could not afford it. She was determined to make her new business a successful one. She was also determined to get rid of the cancer. It did not matter what she was going through, she never gave up and she worked right through it.
            Through this whole experience I have come to realize that anything can happen; it may be unplanned and even unfair, but you cannot let whatever it is beat you. Although some days it was hard to deal with, I still lived my life. I received better grades then ever before, I maintained a job, and I even did extra community service. The difference between now and five years ago is that I see the importance of everything and because of this I work to the best of my ability at everything I do. My mother’s determination never ceases to amaze me. She molded me into the person I am today, and for that I will always be grateful.

Essay #40
By Hannah Lasko
Northwest Regional # 7 High School

           As we flew from one end of the basketball court to the other, like a cluster of bees, all we could hear was, “Come on ladies! Keep it up!” That is what we were to her; ladies. From Daisy Scouts to basketball, we were not kids or girls, but always ladies.
            She was a person who always helped, a person who always cared, a person who had no children of her own, and a person who had cancer. Finding out that she had breast cancer was devastating not only to her, but also to her 10 year old ladies.
            From the onset, the impression Susan made on me was significant. Perhaps because she knew how to handle me, a shy, self-doubting 5 year old with crocodile tears that poured at a moment’s notice. She knew how to calm my fears instinctively, and to me this meant the world.
            We had started as her Daisies fresh from Kindergarten. She guided us through years of scouting, all the while enduring our girlish silliness. From hauling sleeping gear, to swatting beastly bugs, to dodging raccoons on the way to the latrine, to calming high-pitched screams as ghostly shadows danced through the tent walls.
            Little did I know at the time of Susan’s strength. Even when her life was slammed with the unimaginable, she did not let the cancer consumer her. Instead she stared down death and remained strong. She knew what was important in life; not vanity when her hair began to fall, but the strength she gained from everything she did. Even with the burden of cancer laid upon her, she took the time to teach us with loving care. At a time in her life when she had the right to be selfish, she chose us instead of self-pity.
            Susan introduced Relay for Life to me and it became a big part of my life. Her strength as she walked the survivor lap, year after year, is still vivid in my mind. Like the little bee I had once been, I followed her around the Relay for Life track, proud to be in her life. With each year her determination remained strong, but her health failed. When I was 14, despite her valiant fight, Susan left this world too soon.
            Relay for Life continues to be an annual event for me. Although Susan is gone, and the childhood team she once coached has flown in different directions, I always walk proudly in memory of Susan. She touched my life in a way that I will never forget. I try to emulate her soft-spoken manner in which she lived, her strength to endure hardships, and her love for life. But mostly, I try to be, forever a lady. As each spring approaches, no matter where I am, I will join a Relay for Life team to help raise money for a cure. As I walk, it is Susan I will remember and thank for giving me a cause to fight.

Last Update: 29-Apr-2010

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